moonspeak

2011-06-18T01:13:00.001-06:00

RIP
clairemargueritte.blogspot.com
2/10/10 - 6/18/11

it's been real.
stay sweet.

2011-06-09T01:48:00.003-06:00

this isn't working out... soooo should we just make-out and call it good?*

*no mom, this didn't actually happen.

2011-06-09T01:29:00.002-06:00

i decided to buy the continuous spray sun-tan lotion so i'd be able to apply it myself. YES I'M SINGLE.

2011-06-07T16:02:00.000-06:00

sometimes i think i'd make a better character than human being.

2011-05-30T00:43:00.002-06:00

i'm allergic to bees but addicted to you. both have the potential to destroy me.

2011-05-08T18:50:00.002-06:00

happy mother's day! i like it when people wish me a happy mother's day. i'm not a mom, but i'm a pre-mom. MOM: phase one. and that counts for something.

2011-05-06T03:32:00.003-06:00

it could have been yours. it could have been mine. and now i guess we'll never know. but the truth is i ate that salsa. and i liked. quite frankly, i loved it. consider the mystery of who owns the salsa MOOT. you're welcome.

ps. i'm awake.

2011-05-04T13:43:00.002-06:00

you're not ready?.. i don't think you're ready either.

2011-05-03T18:42:00.001-06:00

skeleton sweatshirt. gummy octopuses. airsoft gun. things are about to get crazayyy.

2011-05-02T15:14:00.002-06:00

so you're in the game. you haven't won yet, but at least you're playing. some people cant even get their shoes on right. you on the other hand got a pat on the bum as you ran onto the field. so keep your chin up, alright.

2011-04-27T03:02:00.001-06:00

sometimes i am so dumb i want to punch myself right on the side of my head! KABLAMO!

2011-04-22T01:45:00.001-06:00

who's got 2 thumbs and her own check book!? THIS KID! woo! adult city!

2011-04-20T17:35:00.002-06:00

i am my father's daughter. this really hit me the other day when i saw my roommate loading the dishwasher incorrectly. i thought it would have been rude to reload everything she put in, but boy did i want to.

2011-04-19T23:14:00.002-06:00

new favorite game: decide how you're going to respond to a text before you read it or even who it's from.

blop-bleep-bloop!

"i can't, i feel ugly." perfect.

2011-04-19T22:03:00.002-06:00

because of liz lemon, i'm ok being a loser with a bad haircut.

now gimme some of that pop-tart.

2011-04-19T21:38:00.002-06:00

bad news, guys. pay day is next week. i lasted 4 whole days. 4. where did it all go? why was i so convinced i was getting paid this friday? i have no idea.

2011-04-18T01:45:00.003-06:00

this song pretty much describes my relationship with mcdonalds.

"i'll have a mcdouble and snack size oreo mcflurry, please."

2011-04-09T23:56:00.002-06:00

i have an alter ego. she doesn't have a name (yet) but she's sexy as hell and shoots people like there's no tomorrow. if you piss me off you better believe my un-named second self is wasting no time blowing you to bits.

2011-03-28T22:19:00.003-06:00

damn you, jane austen! the day i moved into my room i have wished that one night when i least expected it my lover would tap on my window to steal me away into the night. so here i am watching emma when i hear a light tap-tap... could it be!? yes of course! i'm not expecting anyone so yes it makes perfect sense! here he is! but no. the tapping was not on my window but on my door. of course. my roommate wanted to eat my graham crackers. of course.

jane, you have filled my heart with butterflies and dreams. but my reality does not include things so nice as an english accent. so i must force my thoughts back to ugly american english, and with that i say DAMN!

2011-03-26T02:40:00.003-06:00

i'm currently reading a novel that my friend wrote. first draft. first eyes ever to read his words. a real honor.

when i was in the middle of the second chapter a friend popped up on chat. "no time to talk," i told him. "i'm reading a book my friend wrote."

"o wow that's great. i want to write a book," he said.

when i was in the middle of the third chapter another friend popped up on chat. "can't talk," i said. "i'm reading a book my friend wrote."

"pretty cool," he said. "i've always wanted to write a book."

so... does everyone want to write a book? the answer is yes. because i too want write a book.

STUPIDDDDDDDDDD.

2011-03-16T02:12:00.002-06:00

i wonder if i close my eyes so tight and muster all the magic i have in my body, the magic in my fingers and toes and eyelashes, if i gather it all in one spot, into one single wish, you will knock on my door right now... right. now. riiiiiight nowwwwww.

2011-03-16T01:42:00.006-06:00

"i did not want to be ridiculous, but i desired to be terrible." -the kreutzer sonata

amen.

2011-03-14T00:45:00.001-06:00

initiating operation SHUT DOWN.

2011-03-10T15:00:00.002-07:00

i want to go to prom. psyche! i just want to go to a dance or event or something that has a drop net full of balloons. i'll do it myself if i have to!

2011-03-03T01:59:00.002-07:00

it's 2 am and i'm doing handstands in my room listening to super freak on repeat.

how cliche.

2011-03-02T16:26:00.004-07:00

sometimes when i write things i read them over and over again. its therapeutic or something. like i could finally articulate what i had been thinking, but just for a moment. so i keep reading it. because if i tried to say it again it would come out all wrong.

2011-03-02T02:36:00.003-07:00

lindsay and i decided one night that girls are like cheese. we figured we were the blue cheese of the world. not very many people like blue cheese, but the ones that do, really love it. turns out i'm more of a cheddar cheese kind of girl. sharp cheddar. you think you like it until you try it. one bite, two bites, 3 bites... no it's not in your mind. this sharp cheddar really is gross. not what you thought at all.

2011-03-01T01:19:00.001-07:00

sometimes crazy is a good thing.

2011-03-01T00:10:00.000-07:00

all i want in this life is for someone to brush my teeth for me before i go to bed. PLEASE.

2011-02-27T15:37:00.001-07:00

i hate how good looking you are.

2011-02-24T16:09:00.003-07:00

my boss says if you don't tell anyone about your plans it will never be a reality. that's why we're supposed to ask "and who have you told about your plans to go back to school?" on each of our phone calls (i never do. too weird.) but just in case he's right...

i'm going to run a marathon on may 21st.

2011-02-24T16:07:00.001-07:00

i'm really good at making pop-up cards. like really good.

2011-02-18T04:42:00.002-07:00

step aside jb, tim riggins is coming through. and he's only pretending to be a teenager.

2011-02-18T02:10:00.002-07:00

at least i can pick good laundry detergent. because let me tell you what, my clothes smell AMAZING!

2011-02-16T16:42:00.002-07:00

i wish someone had taken a candid picture of me just now. it would have been really good.

2011-02-13T15:49:00.002-07:00

justin bieber is the best thing in my life right now.

2011-02-08T15:07:00.003-07:00

i want to volunteer at an orphanage while i'm in quito this fall. i emailed this guy expressing my deep desire to serve with his organization. his response?

"what does your brother do at the embassy?"

.....

my response?

2011-02-03T16:11:00.000-07:00

how much nice is too much nice?

this question has been weighing on my mind for some time now...

2011-01-29T17:23:00.001-07:00

the note i didn't post in my shared bathroom:

Hello babies,

When we go to the bathroom, we flush the toilet. If something gets stuck on the way down, we take care of it. We don’t wait for our mom or roommate to clean it up for us. Because that’s gross. And that’s what babies do.

Love,

Mom

PS MAYBE YOU COULD BUY TOILET PAPER NEXT TIME.

2011-01-27T18:29:00.002-07:00

work is optional but i'm still here. we're not supposed to watch videos or listen to music but i am. when there are only 4 people in the office i make my own rules. but my question is this: should i be embarrassed that my first youtube video of rebellion was the motivation proclamation?

good charlotte anyone??

2011-01-26T23:18:00.001-07:00

how do i eat penguins?? 2 AT A TIME!

2011-01-26T19:17:00.003-07:00

tolstoy makes my heart bleed and spirit sing just like my fave r&b songs.

*i just want to give a shout-out to my girl rhianna, bad-boy r. kelly, and the queen miss beyonce knowles!

2011-01-21T03:51:00.003-07:00

gmail is making me sad. i can't tell if it's my new grey colored tabs or the fact that i only have 2 emails in my inbox. one is from me.

2011-01-21T03:37:00.002-07:00

the other day at work i talked to a man from kentucky about signing up for a criminal justice program. i asked him for his date of birth. he replied "may twentieth... o no, sorry that's my wife's birthday. my birthday is april eighteenth." i love that man. and he loves his wife. i was overcome.

2011-01-21T03:23:00.002-07:00

NO BOYS ALLOWED.

just one of many slogans for my upcoming line of abstinence-promoting underwear for girls.

2011-01-21T03:16:00.002-07:00

it's 3:15 and "3 am" by matchbox 20 just started to play on pandora. that's probably the only time i'll smile when i hear a matchbox 20 song.

2011-01-18T14:51:00.002-07:00

remember who you are. and more importantly, remember who you are not. so the next time you're tempted to diagnose someone with bi-polar disorder or suggest they just go ahead and stop taking all their medicine, ask yourself this, "who am i?" and if the answer is not "a doctor!" just go ahead and keep your mouth shut.

2011-01-15T11:14:00.001-07:00

every time i go get another snack at work i'm worried someone is going to say "whoa claire, i think you've had enough." i just wish the cereal bowls were bigger.

2011-01-14T15:16:00.002-07:00

peach yogurt, you're gross. get out of my mouth.

2011-01-14T02:33:00.002-07:00

you were in my dream last night. we were in england. you told me you had to go fight a fire in france. you had to go rescue the people. i looked at you and said "i forgot we were in england. i forgot france is so close." and then you smiled at me for being so silly. i smiled back. and then we kissed. just kidding. we only smiled. and then my dream was over.

2011-01-11T21:31:00.003-07:00

i used to be like "o i'm too embarrassed to dress up."

but now i'm like "dress up?? ok yes i'll do it!"

2011-01-08T23:09:00.001-07:00

2011-01-08T17:55:00.001-07:00

mom! quick! i need you to send me my airsoft gun! rush delivery! overnight delivery! yes the weighted one! no time to explain!

2011-01-08T17:40:00.001-07:00

why do i always want to punch people?

2011-01-05T17:16:00.002-07:00

"this is the weirdest thing i have ever done..."

was said by-

a) me right before i made bret my emergency contact at work

b) my roommate right before she put her dishes IN the dishwasher

c) lindsay right before she entered the mtc

2011-01-04T09:31:00.002-07:00

disneyland park hopper ticket on ebay: $55

gas: who knows

snacks: who cares

hotel: never heard of it

being with my friends at the happiest place on earth: PRICELESS

2010-12-31T22:37:00.001-07:00

patrick swayze: nobody puts baby in the corner.

me: don't call me baby.

2010-12-18T02:05:00.001-07:00

guess what...

2010-12-18T01:59:00.001-07:00

how am i doing? well i've been listening to "good charlotte radio" on pandora for the past week if that means anything to you.

2010-12-17T10:40:00.002-07:00

no matter what you say, i can never take you seriously when you're wearing a tank top.

2010-12-15T01:28:00.002-07:00

just a little sugar every night keeps me feeling like a woman.

-written by t. clark and myself

2010-12-13T23:50:00.002-07:00

i read a blog about failure today. it really resonated with me. here's hoping i get a 95 on my anatomy final.

2010-12-13T23:46:00.002-07:00

i hate it when people steal my jokes. i hate it even more when people steal woody allen's jokes. it's not ok. it's never ok.

2010-12-11T04:17:00.000-07:00

i just decided i'm going to be a morning person. so good morning i guess.

2010-12-10T18:57:00.001-07:00

shouldn't brandon flowers be fighting his own ninjas? i mean really, who wears the pants in that relationship?

2010-12-06T01:44:00.002-07:00

i just thought of the best joke but its too dirty for my blog and too dirty for my journal which means.... i'll just have to tell it to my mom.

2010-12-02T13:48:00.001-07:00

JUST NOW ON GCHAT
Bret: you are so weird
but so happy
and that is all that matters

thanks bret <3

2010-12-02T13:43:00.003-07:00

talking about fighting a grandma is pretty bad. but talking about fighting a grandma in 40 years isn't bad at all since i'll be a grandma then too.

grandmas can fight grandmas. fair game.

2010-12-02T13:38:00.003-07:00

hey! girl! stand up straight! you're awkward shy-girl slump isn't going to be so hip when you're 65. you'll just look weak and feeble. and i'll crush you.

2010-11-30T13:42:00.002-07:00

"hello, dummies" is the best opener i can come up with for my graduation speech.

2010-11-28T15:10:00.001-07:00

how do you casually say, "tell me intimate details of your life."

??????????

2010-11-23T19:41:00.001-07:00

looks like our relationship lasted as long as my bag of mike and ikes.

2010-11-23T13:48:00.001-07:00

clean. cook. craft. eat. REPEAT.
i can't stop.

2010-11-22T15:58:00.001-07:00

will someone please remove this horcrux from around my neck before i kill someone?

2010-11-21T17:50:00.002-07:00

mormon 1:19
"and it came to pass that there were sorceries, and witchcrafts, and magics; and the power of the evil one was wrought upon all the face of the land..."

am i going to hell for immediately thinking of that?

2010-11-21T15:12:00.002-07:00

i just watched a video of myself and i couldn't help but think "i like that girl. she's got personality."

2010-11-18T08:38:00.002-07:00

when i yell "WE GOTTA GO PEOPLE!" as i speed through a red light i have no idea who i'm talking to. i know no one is in my car. duh.

2010-11-17T00:20:00.000-07:00

claire margueritte, marine biologist.

2010-11-16T14:41:00.001-07:00

i was this close to texting every boy i've ever kissed, "remember when we used to kiss?"

2010-11-15T23:36:00.002-07:00

i am repeatedly amazed by how stupid boys are. i think it's about time i just expect it. my standards were probably too high anyway. so how about i just take the fall for this one, dudes. i'm sorry for thinking you had a brain.

2010-11-15T15:55:00.003-07:00

mass email i sent at work to get my shift covered:

i'm heading up to washington this weekend- would anyone be able to cover my friday pm shift? only 4 hours. it would be over so fast. i'm not going home for thanksgiving... and i just need to see my mom...

my shift was covered in record time!

2010-11-12T10:42:00.003-07:00

can't wake up with a boy? why not wake up with martha?!

2010-11-11T13:27:00.002-07:00

in my dreams seals and moose are my friends. according to dreammoods.com that's a good thing.

seal: to see a seal in your dream, indicates your playfulness, prosperity, good luck, faithfulness, success, security in love and spiritual understanding.

moose: to see a moose in your dream, represents long life and longevity.

i can't help thinking it means i have befriended someone who could hurt me. all fun and games now, but who's laughing when a mad seal bites your leg off? or a moose tramples you to death?

2010-11-10T21:20:00.001-07:00

it was just a coincidence i was listening to that song while staring at your picture. really. i mean obviously.

2010-11-10T13:55:00.001-07:00

hello, world.

2010-11-09T20:35:00.003-07:00

i saw a boy today who was about as attractive as brad pitt and colin farrell combined. ya... that good. while i was staring at him really trying to take his beauty in i heard him speak. HE'S ENGLISH. right then i just wanted to stand up and shout "YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!"

2010-11-09T20:04:00.002-07:00

my room smells weird but i don't even care because i just rode my bike home from the temple listening to wicked and i sang and people could hear me but i was like "once you're with the wizard... no one thinks you're strange!" HEYOOO!

2010-11-05T19:12:00.002-06:00

ms. flaherty,

i don't like you. stay away from my sister.

hannah's pissed-off sister,

claire

2010-11-04T17:47:00.002-06:00

i burst through the library doors and yelled "sanctuary! sanctuary! sanctuary!"
nothing can touch me within these walls.

let my books teach me. let my pen guide me. let my calculator show me truth.

2010-11-04T01:17:00.002-06:00

give me a paintball gun.

give me 500 paintballs.

i don't need a target. i'll provide my own target.

2010-11-03T01:35:00.002-06:00

i'm wearing lipstick to bed to spice up my dreams. i'm shooting for pg-13 but i'd be happy with pg.

2010-11-02T21:34:00.002-06:00

"quick get out of the car! there's a bomb!" i say that every time a car doesn't start right away. but it never gets the reaction it did when i first said it to my dad and brother when i was seven years old (we had just watched the pelican brief the night before). that was my first real joke that got a real adult laugh.

2010-11-01T03:53:00.000-06:00

some people walk like robots. today i walked like a zombie.

2010-10-28T23:06:00.002-06:00

today i looked like a girl version of mike myers.

2010-10-27T01:34:00.002-06:00

fool me once, shame on you.

fool me twice, shame on me.

fool me three times, shame on me.

fool me four times, shame on me.

fool me five times, shame on me.

fool me six times, shame on me.

fool me seven times, shame on me.

fool me eight times, shame on me.

fool me nine times, shame on me.

2010-10-25T23:50:00.002-06:00

punch me in the ovaries. stuff me in a suitcase and send me to japan.

2010-10-24T07:18:00.000-06:00

not even a wink of sleep.

2010-10-14T16:47:00.004-06:00

even if you work at victoria's secret, it's still probably not appropriate to ask a stranger about her sex life.

"so do you have a special event coming up? :) ;) :o :P"

"...no."

2010-10-11T22:06:00.002-06:00

PEOPLE LOVE TO LOOK SO CRAZY BUSY.

it's like saying "i'm important and smart and productive and mature" all in one.

2010-10-11T19:47:00.002-06:00

someone once told me there are two types of girls at byu: smokin hot and shallow or plain looking and deep.

nobody wins.